I’m going to be nicer. I’m going to hold my tongue. I’m going to think before I speak.
I haven’t done that for a very long time. I don’t like much about myself these days and that’s the reason. It’s easy getting pulled in when people laugh. It’s easy to think people like you when really, they just think you’re funny.
That old saying, "laughter is good for the soul"--it's wrong. Laughter is good for the ego; kindness is good for the soul. And I'm missing the kindness.
I lost a part of myself, the nice part, and I’m going to spend time finding it again.
I’m blaming no one but myself. It's one hundred percent my fault. So I'm taking responsibility and I'm changing. I’m going to surround myself with things that make me happy. I’m going to hang out with my friends who (hopefully still) like me for who I am inside and try to get to that place again.
I tried it the other way. And frankly, it’s just not worth it.