Monday, October 14, 2013

It's Her Turn Now

We’ve entered the Bat Mitzvah Circuit, Round 2. Round 2 because it is now my younger daughter’s turn.

All of her camp friends, Hebrew school friends and some of her school friends are now having Bar and Bat Mitzvahs. Most weekends are taken up with at least one event. If we’re lucky, we’ll have a few weekends off. Having survived it the first time around with my older one, I’m pretty confident I’ll survive this one.

However, I have learned a few things.

      1)   Even though I’m glad she has friends, I’m starting to dread opening the mailbox. However, not opening it is bad for our credit rating, as the bills won’t get paid. The mailman will also start to get annoyed. Better to just grin and bear it.
      2)   Don’t bother buying socks, sweatshirts or pajamas this year. She’ll receive a pair of socks—much cooler than any I can buy on sale and in bulk—at every event she attends. She’ll also receive sweatshirts and pajama pants as favors.
      3)   Use the opportunity to plan weekend or day trips. If I’m going to have to schlep to DC, I might as well enjoy myself! The same goes for a day in Pennsylvania—the farmland is beautiful this time of year.
      4)   Use the time with only one kid to enjoy some mother/daughter, father/daughter bonding time. It doesn’t happen often!
      5)   Let her go to as many as she wants (when possible). It’s a rite of passage and it only happens. It’s her chance to enjoy herself. Don’t be “that” mom if you don’t have to be.
      6)   Be proud when she stresses the importance of the service. It’s about way more than a cool party, and if she gets it, that’s awesome!
      7)   When she understands she can’t attend every single one, let her make the decision about what ones to skip. They’re her friends, let her differentiate—it will make it easier when it comes time to create her invitation list.

Most importantly, realize this is a situation with a definite end in sight. Yes, it will pass. Wine and chocolate will help (don’t they always?). In the meantime, I’m gasing up the car and getting ready for the next road trip.


  1. The sheer joy you (and your wallet) will feel when round 2 is over is tempered with the sadness that it's indeed, all over